Friday, May 27, 2005

3 Unusual Happenings Worth Noting

1. I almost ate a bug this evening.

It flew into my open mouth while I was chatting with Allan on the phone. Then it got STUCK in the back of my throat and I couldn't get it out. Allan suggested gargling with water - which finally dislodged the insect. It's still alive - I might add - at least it was wiggling as it swirled down the sink. It appeared to be a small moth.

It is probably a sign of the security of our relationship that a) I didn't hang up so Allan got the complete audio track of my gasping, coughing, spluttering and gargling out the bug and b) that he did not laugh at me. For a worse moth in bodily orifice story read this.

2. I followed my mother's instructions

..and made up the lost FIAR "story squares" for the kids map of the world.

For more info vist fiveinarow.com. For every book we "row" - we put the square up on the map of the world. Quite a few of these went missing during the move and the M's were upset about that today. This involved looking up book titles on amazon.com, saving the little book cover .jpg's, putting them all into a word document and sizing them all to the correct size, printing them out, cutting them out, locating the contact paper (the longest part of the whole process) and then laminating them. They are now back on the map.

3. I found a funny ":fwd" I think is worth passing on

Most of you probalby know my "don't send me ANY forwards" policy. So in keeping with that - I'm posting it here on the blog rather than sending it to my e-mail address book. I read this outloud to Allan - who kept saying "That is NOT funny" over and over again. I wonder why?

Human Resources Lingo

COMPETITVE SALARY: We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors

JOIN OUR FAST PACED TEAM: We have no time to train you

MUST BE DEADLINE ORIENTED: You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day

SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED: Some time each night and some time each weekend

DUTIES WILL VARY: Anyone in the office can boss you around

MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL: We have no quality control

CAREER-MINDED: Femaile applicants must be childless (and remain that way)

SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE: You will need it to replace the three people who just left.

PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST: You are walking into a company in perpetual chaos.

REQUIRES TEAM-LEADERSHIP SKILLS: You'll have the responsibility of a manager, without the pay or respect

GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS: Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.

2 comments:

Jo said...

The way you call the kids the "M's" just cracks me up. Makes me want to refer to mine as the ABC's. :D

Ewwwwww bug in the throat! NOT cool! But whatahubby to not laugh at you eh?

Cheryl said...

My mom called us her ABC's/ABCD's (my sisters being Allison, Beth and Debbie)